Why You're Not Achieving Your Goals

Disclaimer: This is a repost of something I wrote at Betterself.com. It's a great website that everyone should check out. It seemed relevant as I've had a lot of people ask me or talk to me about goals. Just to update this time-wise, I've paid off one of my 2 student loans and hit the first of 5 milestones on my quest to buy a house. Enjoy. Also, I don't know why the text is back-lit and the like.

At any given time someone is setting a goal, aiming to hit it, and then blowing it completely.  It seems like “goal-oriented” people are spending more time setting goals and less time conquering them. It’s a condition called “you’re dumb”.  With a few simple guidelines (and the minerals to stick to them) you can stop setting goals and start achieving them. And, in case you’re wondering, in the past 2 months I have gotten rid of 75% of my belongings, paid off 3 of my 4 debts, healed a life-long leg injury, and spent more leisure time with friends than I have in the previous 6 months. So, trust me. I know what I’m saying.

Problem 1: Your Goals Suck

I actually don’t care what your goals are. They may be that you’re trying to get in shape, get a degree, or obtain the largest collection of Polly Pocket memorabilia. None of that matters. What is important is that you state your goals in a specific and tangible manner, one that you can take calculated steps towards accomplishing, instead of just vague, half-assed attempts. “Get in shape” is not a goal. It’s an idea and a crappy one at that. Round is a shape and I’m pretty sure that’s not what you’re going for. Also, getting in better shape than you are now really isn’t an accomplishment, depending on how out of shape you are. “Run 400 meters in under 50 seconds” is a goal and a damn good one. Not only is it a lofty ambition to begin with, it’s specific enough for you to take real steps towards getting there. You’ll probably even get “in shape” on your way to it. “Get rich” is another crappy goal. Take what you have and buy a one way ticket to Rwanda. You’ll be the East Egger of Africa. Goal accomplished, right?

Problem 2: You’re Not Actually Trying to Meet Your Goal

This is a very common problem for the simple reason that goals take work. Everybody thinks they have goals, but very few people will put in the work that it takes to actually achieve them, except for telling the office receptionist that you’re “totally writing the next great American novel”. Just setting a goal is not enough. You need to take huge steps towards that goal if you ever want to meet it. What good is setting a goal if you’re not going to put in the effort to achieve it? How can you be saving to buy a house if you’re not putting away a substantial part of your paycheck to save for it? The whole concept of setting a goal is based on the idea that your goal is worth sacrificing and laboring for. If it isn’t, see Problem 1. So, once you have a goal, actually WORK towards it. Order water instead of 8 beers if you’re trying to fit into that bridesmaid’s dress. Stay up late studying if you want that 4.0. And give up your weekly Crate & Barrel shopping sprees if you’re trying to get out of debt. You may miss out on the latest gluten-free couch cushions, but the knowledge that a credit card company no longer owns your income is well worth it.

Problem 3: Your Support System Blows

The age old problem of peer pressure. Just because you don’t have pimples and there’s no locker to get stuffed into doesn’t mean it will go away. As soon as you set a goal I guarantee that most people in your life (including loved ones) will try to derail it. It could be your mom forcing extra spaghetti on you if you’re trying to lose weight, your friends pushing you into a Vegas trip if you’re trying to save money, or your significant other playing the guilt game because you want to go to church and try to change your life. People who rarely challenge themselves become threatened when you take the initiative to challenge yourself. These people are called “toxic” and while you can’t simply get rid of all of them, you’d be best served if you dropped most of them. It may sound harsh, but think about it. These people are committed to dragging you down and keeping you in a lifestyle that you are trying to escape. They are not thoughtful enough to respect your choices, so why keep them around? Surround yourself with people who support your goals and decisions or just simply go it alone. Liked I said before, your goals are worth it.

Bonus Round: You don't yeh. 'Nuff said. Meow.

You’re no longer dumb and you have everything you need to accomplish and slay your goals, unless you don’t know how to read. In that case, put the computer down and order Baby Einstein. And someone please forward this to Congress.


AOW: Find five books that you want to read. Write down the titles and authors. Buy one and start it. Easy stuff.